Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Randomize
