Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
