if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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