I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
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