I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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