I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
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