Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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