I will die if light touches me.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
This show inspires me to have sex in space
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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