i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Someone signed my nipple.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
