Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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