Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize