omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize