you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize
