You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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