I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Randomize