hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Less talking, more tequila
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize