we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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