and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
