someone get that fucking seahorse.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
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