I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize