Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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