awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
