I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Randomize
