piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
