Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
