We won't sleep together?
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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