You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
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