i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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