and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
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