Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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