Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
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