i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
In America we eat man semen.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
What happened to fro yo and sex?
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