just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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