what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I just want to make out with him forever
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
