Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
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