He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
