in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
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