I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.