I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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