I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Randomize
