Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
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