What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
