laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
It's shark week go big or go home
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Randomize