I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
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