You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
