is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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