He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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