Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize