also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
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No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
I would ride that face into the sunset
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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