so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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