I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
